Super Mario RPG

0:17 Hello, everyone, and welcome back to The Other Castle. The Other Castle, I'm Andrea. And my name is Tom. And here on The Other Castle, we do the plot, lore, and more of video games. We do the development, we do the creation, and we do the game itself. Yes, we do, and this week we are doing Super Mario RPG. I like that you found a way to get a Mario game in here that has a story. Yes, finally, right? This is our very first Mario game. I mean, you could make up a story of like, oh, he's got to fucking swim. But this one's actually a real thing. I'm excited to hear about this. If you want to hear even more about this though, you can go to our website, theothercastlepodcast.com. That's the othercastlepodcast.com. Because it has the link to our Patreon where we are doing the history of Mario, just like as a whole.

1:00 Yeah, because, you know, a lot of games about Mario actually have a full story other than this one. Right, but it's fascinating because it's obviously the biggest juggernaut in gaming in terms of franchise. Right, which is the reason why this game even exists, which we'll get into. I love that. But yes, we're doing a full breakdown on the history of Mario from Shigeru Miyamoto up to today. That's so cool. Also over there, you can sign up for our Discord. We are bullying Tom into getting a tramp stamp over there. Still not going to happen, everybody. We're still going to try because bullying is fun and easy. And evil, so don't do it. Wait, what? Fuck. God damn it. But anyway, we're here for Super Mario RPG.

1:42 Let's go. Super Mario RPG is a 1996 Super Nintendo game produced in collaboration between Nintendo and Squaresoft. Wait, Squaresoft is a part of this? Yeah, Squaresoft, which later became Square Enix. Holy shit, I had no idea they ever were involved with the Mario. That's wild. Yeah, only time, actually. Oh, so it didn't go great. I'm assuming the partnership immediately dissolved after one title. Oh, no. Well, first, we need to talk about two other game series entirely in order to understand how Super Mario RPG came about. The first being the Final Fantasy series, as this is the series that made Square a big name in gaming. It saved Square.

2:23 It did, yeah. The other being Donkey Kong Country, a collaboration between Nintendo and Rareware. Final Fantasy is a series that has name recognition across the world today. However, that was not always the case. Final Fantasy had released six titles by 1994, and while they were really popular in Japan, only three of those titles had released in the US. The original Final Fantasy, Final Fantasy IV, which released in the US as number two, and Final Fantasy VI as number three in the US. And that's your favorite one, right? Or is there something weird with the numbers? No, VI is my favorite, yeah. 36 Mafia. Yeah, I've been playing these games since the very original one.

3:07 And yeah, Final Fantasy VI is one of my all-time favorite games. That's really cool. But I was in the minority. The truth was, JRPGs did not sell well in the United States. It had a small and dedicated fan base, but they were deemed too complicated for the typical American gamer. Up to this point, Nintendo and Square had exclusivity deals with every title they released going directly to Nintendo consoles. So Square approached Nintendo with a proposal to make a JRPG using Mario and his cast of supporting characters in order to bring the concept of JRPGs to the mainstream. Clever. After all, Square had mastered the art of JRPGs with Final Fantasy VI and Chrono Trigger.

3:48 They just needed an IP that could bring in a new audience. If it's an IP that brings motherfuckers in, it's gonna be Mario. Yeah, he is more recognized than Mickey Mouse at this point. And Jesus, I think. Yeah. They saw this collab as a chance to basically advertise the concept of JRPGs and, by extension, their other games. Nintendo was into the idea and were eager to work with Square on this ambitious project. In early talks, it was decided that just making a Final Fantasy title with Mario characters wasn't the right direction to take. Enter Donkey Kong Country. The reason this game is important to the story is due to the technology that was used when the game was made.

4:30 Rare was the developer that made Donkey Kong Country, and they used a new computer software that had only been used by a small indie studio out of Finland prior to this. Was it Remedy? No, it wasn't Remedy, no. I know one Finnish studio. No, this doesn't have a big name today. Gotcha. This computer software allowed developers to create full 3D characters and environments. Then it would flatten those models to work in a 2D world. Oh, cool. This elevated the graphics of the Super Nintendo exponentially, allowing for extremely smooth character models and environments at a fraction of the programming space needed. Hell yeah. The term for it became pre-rendered graphics.

5:13 Square loved the look of Donkey Kong Country and asked about the equipment used. So Nintendo put them in touch with Rare, and they purchased all the same things Rare had used to make their game. The next hurdle was the story. Square had made a bunch of fun JRPGs, but they were all pretty elevated in terms of story. Yeah, it's a lot of like political drama, which you can't really put the Mushroom Kingdom into. Yeah, they were geared towards older gamers that could understand a deep and often dark complex story. Like I know this is further ahead in the timeline, but Phantom Fantasy VII is about environmentalism. Yeah, right? You really can't bring that up.

5:54 No. So Mario's creator, absolute legend Shigeru Miyamoto, wanted to be involved as much as possible to make sure the tone of the game didn't veer in the wrong direction. To help keep the tone of the game light, everyone at Square listened to stand-up comedy during the workday. I do that. Yeah, which has resulted in the game being known for its humor as much as any other aspect of the game. Did you find out who they were listening to? No, I didn't. Because if you did this today, there's a wide range. If you throw on a Rogan fucking hour, and Mario could be anti-vax, that could be problematic.

6:35 Or we could get into some Ali Wong shit, and then we've got him opening up mushroom buttholes and licking them and getting real nasty and shit like that. Yeah, I think these are Japanese stand-up comics they were listening to. So it's different. Much different. In the 90s on top of that. Being a Mario game, everyone at both Square and Nintendo had a lot of opinions on what makes something a Mario game. Can Mario use magic? He can turn into a raccoon after all in some of his games. Plus he can shoot fireballs. Is that magic? Yeah, fireball is a D&D spell. Right. Should Mario carry a sword as his weapon? Yes, that's fucking punk as shit. Or should he use a giant hammer like back in the days of his first appearance in the Donkey Kong Arcade?

7:19 Since nobody could decide, they went to the fans. At a small convention in Japan, Square Nintendo quietly announced Super Mario RPG and straight up held a live poll asking the audience, should Mario's attacks be magic and swords or jumping in mallets? The way the internet would be fucking ravenous if they tried to pull some shit like that today. Oh my god. That was a magical time. Yeah. The audience was practically silent during the magic and swords option. So they had to build a game they'd never tried to do before. They would need to add things like platforming to an RPG, which they had never attempted.

8:01 Timed button inputs. All sorts of actions because one of the cores of a Mario game is constantly having to push a button. RPGs don't typically have that, as you're just selecting an action and then watching that action take place. And I know the Final Fantasy series did use a lot of cut scenes, so there were elements of like, okay, we can rest and catch up with the narrative for a second. Yeah, and Mario games didn't have that. Right, it's just go, go, go. This game needed to have the player more involved. So they changed up the turn-based style of combat they had perfected and added timed inputs as a way to increase damage during an attack. And we'll talk more about that later. Shigeru Miyamoto has been quoted as saying, I think we've managed to combine the action gameplay of Mario and the turn-based RPG system in a way no one has ever seen before.

8:51 Hell yeah. He wasn't wrong either. Even a reviewer at Nintendo Power Magazine went on to say, it's fun and a little weird, but it's definitely Mario and an RPG. Hell yeah, that is the high compliment, to be real. Yeah. It released in March of 96 in Japan, and May of 96 in the US. Only four months before the Nintendo 64 would come out. Oh, so this was very end-of-life cycle for the console. The very, very end. Europe wouldn't see it until 2008 as a virtual console title. That is so rude. Just fuck the Europeans. Yeah, they were not confident it would sell well in Europe and didn't want to waste the money doing all the translations.

9:34 Wow. But the gamble paid off. Despite being so close to the Nintendo 64's release, Super Mario RPG became so popular, it was a system seller for the Super Nintendo at the very end of its life cycle. Holy shit, that's cool. It also became the basis for the humor and characterizations of all of our favorite characters in the Mario universe as nobody had ever really developed their personalities prior to this game outside the animated TV series. Many of the characters we know and love today got their personalities from this game. And they're just been the same ever since then. They really have. It's been very little changed since this game. That's so Gen X. They pick a fucking personality, and they're like, this is me now.

10:15 I love Nirvana and cigarettes. And you're like, hey, do you care about people? And they're like, cigarettes. Nirvana. Yeah. For many US gamers, it actually was the very first RPG they ever played. Yeah, I bet. Leading them to explore the entire genre from there and enjoying the catalog of excellent games Square and other developers had to offer. Absolutely. Despite its insane success, as it received perfect scores from just about every reviewer, this would be the last time Nintendo and Square would work together for a very long time. The Nintendo 64 was going to be another cartridge based system. Sony, on the other hand, was about to release their first console called the PlayStation, and it was going to be CD based, giving them more power to play with, leading to their next game, Final Fantasy VII, a genuine cultural phenomenon.

11:05 Yeah, I've heard of that one. Nintendo kind of burned their bridge with Square when they found out, and we have never seen a true sequel to Super Mario RPG as a result, mainly because Square shared ownership of all the original characters that were created for the game. A couple years later, we got Paper Mario on the Nintendo 64, and it was a new take on the RPG formula that still utilized a very similar battle system and sense of humor as Mario RPG. I fuck with Paper Mario. I love the art in all the Paper Marios. I think it's beautiful. I love the humor in them. Those are the ones I've actually played. I haven't played this one. Yeah, Paper Mario has gone on to be a very successful series for Nintendo with several sequels. One came out recently.

11:46 Very recently. I think the Origami King. Yeah, that one. There's also the Mario and Luigi series, which is made by damn near the exact same team as Super Mario RPG. Oh, hell yeah. As they formed a new company in order to work with Nintendo again. But still, no true sequel. In 2022, Chihiro Fujika, the director of Super Mario RPG and the Mario and Luigi series, said that he wants his last game to be a true sequel to Super Mario RPG. Which is why I think we received the Masterwork remake on the Switch in 2023. Hell yeah. I think Nintendo was testing the waters to see if people still gave a shit.

12:27 The remake was very quietly made by a developer called Art Piazza. Oh, I've never heard of them. No, they just do kind of ports of games anyway. As well as a few other small studios that work closely with Nintendo. It was announced just months before its release. I can't tell if it was a so confident it won't need advertising or if it was just, just send it out to die. It could go either way, truly. Yeah. Regardless, it was a hit once more. It retained the charm and fun of the original while updating across the board. From graphics to gameplay, everything was elevated and made comfortable for modern consoles. So hopefully, Chihiro Fujika's dream of a true sequel is possible in the next couple years.

13:10 But even if it's not, we still have this classic, which has gone down for many people as one of the greatest RPGs of all time. Currently, number 56 on IGN's top 100 best RPGs. That's impressive. Final Fantasy VI and Chrono Trigger being one and two. Oh, shit. Final Fantasy VI, your favorite? Yeah. That's impressive. You always just assume VII is the one that gets all the glory. No, that one's like number 34. Yeah. Today, we're covering the remaster, as like I said, it's damn near identical to the original anyway. Also, like our South Park, the Stick of Truth episode, you're just going to have to know who all these characters are. There's a certain buy-in with a Mario property. I think we get it.

13:51 Yeah, it's the Mario Universe, and they're all pretty well established. I'm not really going to be explaining who most of them are. Mario is Chris Pratt. No. How did he get Mario and Garfield? Who the fuck is his agent? I don't know, but he has the hardest working agent in Hollywood. Absa-fucking-lutely. It's ridiculous. He's not even in, like, the top three Chris's. No, not even. The fuck? So grab your mallets, hop on a Yoshi, and let's go stomp on some Goombas. Oh, sorry. Don't worry. Not all the Goombas are bad in this game. Oh, I got nervous. I am going to eat some mushrooms, though, so I'm ready for a trip. Yeah, sorry. I realized we call you guys Goombas, and I said let's go stomp some Goombas.

14:31 Oh, don't be mean to the fans. You told me not to bully them at, like, the top of this fucking episode. Shit. Well, let's-a go, everybody. This is Super Mario RPG Legend of the Seven Stars. The game opens up on a sunny, grassy knoll, where Princess Peach is relaxing and smelling some flowers. Just behind her is a tiny run-down shack with a sign over it that says Mario House. As you do. You know how, like, MC Hammer's Mansion says MC Hammer on it? Like, eccentric rich people have their names just on it. Like, it's fucking Saltburn.

15:12 This is his Saltburn. In the original, it was called Pipe House. Oh, that's nasty. Didn't you live in a house with, like, a horrible nickname, like, the Stabbing Cabin or something? That was the nickname. It was Stabbing Cabin? I didn't nickname it that. Thank God. That's horrendous. People who have listened to our World of Warcraft episode. Devon was the one that named it that. Oh, I believe that. Suddenly, the sky turns dark, and from above, the King of Koopas himself, Bowser descends riding in his classic Clowncopter vehicle. I love his little Clowncopter. It's so cute. Yeah, it's that big round, white, jack-in-the-box looking head with a little green propeller out the bottom.

15:53 And it's got a stupid face on it. Yeah. Which is such a great contrast to this pokey, angry Bowser riding it. He swoops in and snatches Princess Peach, taking off with her into the sky. The door to Mario House gets kicked open, and Mario himself comes running out all, oh shit, here we go again. You should have let your bitch inside. Yeah, and he chases after Bowser. Also, since this game was on Super Nintendo, it actually predates Charles Martinet being cast as Mario. And he's been Mario for decades? Decades. He got cast for Mario 64. Goodness. He does not have a voice in this game at all, even in the remake.

16:36 Oh shit. Yeah, Mario in this game is a silent protagonist. Not even a wahoo. No, not even a wahoo. He makes zero noise. Huh. Bowser takes Peach to his castle, and Mario arrives shortly after. The door to the castle opens to welcome you in, and as you enter, you take control of Mario officially. It's a tutorial section, of course, teaching you the basic controls and introducing you to the game's combat system. It's a turn-based battle system with a few mechanics that were invented for Mario RPG. If you hit the A button just before an attack, you'll perform a special move and hit for more damage. For example, just before bashing someone with your mallet, you hit a button, and you'll swing it twice instead of once.

17:20 Or if you're jumping on their head, hitting a button at the right time will allow you to bounce on them again and again until you lose the timing of the button press. This was inspired by early rhythm games lining up timing with a button press. Or you can do the same just before getting hit, and you have a chance at blocking an attack. Is there a prompt for that, or is that something you kind of intrinsically find out as a player? In the original there was no prompt. In the remake they added a prompt, and the better you get at doing it, they take away the prompt for that for a while. You figure it out. Yeah. We also saw these same mechanics in South Park the Stick of Truth as they were inspired by this game. Finally, you make it to Bowser's throne room, but he's nowhere to be found.

18:04 From above, you hear Peach cry for help. You look up and see her dangling by a rope tied around her waist. Oh, shit. You start jumping up and down trying to reach her, and slowly Peach rises higher into the air, up to the chandeliers near the rafters. On top of one of the chandeliers, Bowser is standing there laughing. You leap up onto the chandelier next to his, and Peach tells you to attack the chain holding Bowser's. Once you do, the chandelier falls, and Bowser goes down with it. You celebrate your victory, but Bowser says, Coming Mario? With that, he throws a hammer at your chain, and your chandelier falls with him.

18:44 Oh, it's so Phantom of the Opera. Yeah. We got two dorks fighting over the same girl while we're running through some chandeliers. They're falling. It's just one musical number away from being Phantom of the Opera. The 20-foot-high castle is suddenly hundreds of stories as the two of you fall while riding your chandeliers. That didn't happen in Phantom of the Opera. Bowser says that if he's going down, at least you're going down with him. But you jump on his head and bounce back up the hundreds of floors to where Peach is still dangling. Good. You grab one of the chains and reach out for Peach. But before you can grab her, the castle begins to quake. We get a shot of the outside, and high above the castle is a bright, shining star.

19:28 Around the star, the sky turns red and cloudy as a gigantic sword comes falling from the heavens. Oh, shit! It has eyes and teeth on the hilt and appears to be sentient. The sword slices through the star, splitting it into seven pieces, and they go scattering across the globe. The sword continues to fall and lands on top of Bowser's castle, piercing it. The sword is so large, it towers over Bowser's castle even after being buried in it. The camera shows a wide shot of the castle as the title screen appears. The crash from the sword sends you flying out of the castle and you soar across the sky.

20:11 We see Mario House, and Toad is pacing back and forth outside it. He sees you coming, and you conveniently land in the green pipe that acts as the chimney of Mario House. Toad runs inside, and we see you hanging next to an extra set of your classic blue overalls and red hat. Toad says, Nor will people use the door. Why are you a dick immediately? You saw me fall from the sky. Toad tells you that he's here to pick up Princess Peach. She's running late. When you don't answer, Toad says, It's Bowser again, isn't it? Toad is not good at reading situations. No, Toad's all, Ah, shit, here we go again.

20:53 Then asks if you'll please go rescue her one more time. Because you really need to be prompted to rescue her at this point. You return to the castle and look up at the gigantic sword. The eyes of the sword look down at you, which scares you shitless. It says to go away. This castle now belongs to the Smithy Gang. The way the sword has an attitude like go away. Yeah. Don't look at me. He tells you to get out of here, and he causes an earthquake that destroys the bridge you're on as you barely retreat to safety. Oh shit. You return to Toad, and since you're a silent protagonist, you mime to him everything that happened. Just a lot of flapping and shit.

21:34 Yeah. That's cute. Toad says that you need to go to the Mushroom Kingdom to tell the Chancellor what happened. On the way, you're given a chance to learn more moves, but you also get the option of skipping it, which is nice. You make it to the Mushroom Kingdom, where you can explore the town portion just like you would any JRPG. It's a town of Toads, and you can talk with them and hear their one line each. You head to Peach's Castle, where Toad takes you to see the Chancellor. You once again mime out the entire encounter, even turning into Bowser and Peach to tell a more vivid tale. It's almost like talking to your friends when they're drunk. You only really get every fifth word, but you have to kind of figure out where they're pointing and shit.

22:14 You're like, oh, yeah, totally, I get you. The Chancellor freaks out, saying, you need to go rescue the princess. That's like your one job. Why do we have to keep reiterating that this is the highest priority for you? You exit the castle, and as you get back to town, you hear someone shout, get back here! From around a corner, you see a purple crocodile with a sack over his back running from a little white fluff of a person. Little white fluff? Yeah, he looks like a living marshmallow or the Michelin Man as a kid. And he has a little pink mohawk. The crocodile leaps over a wall and the Michelin kid squats down like a cat preparing to spring.

22:54 He jumps a whopping two inches and falls flat on his face. Oh, sweetie. He stands up, saying he just lost his grandfather's lucky coin. Then he begins to cry. As he cries, the sky turns dark and it begins to rain. Oh no. You run over to the little guy and he stops crying and the rain clears. He says that everyone just needs to let out a good cry every now and then. Not if you're the auntie from Encanto. Maybe try Lexapro if that's kind of what happens when you're sad. Let's get you on some SSRI shit, you know? Maybe modulate this. As you were talking to him, a little girl comes over and asks if you're really going to defeat Bowser again and asks you to show her one of your famous jumps.

23:41 So you jump for her and the little puff boy goes, hold up, you're the Mario? You have more jump in you than a box of frogs. What a wholesome thing to say. He introduces himself as Mallow from Tadpole Pond. He says that he's a frog, and it's really embarrassing, but he can't jump despite looking nothing like a frog. But, you know, Toad doesn't look anything like a Toad, so fuck it. True. They do not understand amphibians in this world. He asks if you would help him catch that thief and get his grandfather's coin back. You agree to help because that's what a Mario does. And you literally can't say no. Yeah. Because silent protagonist.

24:22 You head to the east exit of the Mushroom Kingdom, and Toad says he saw the crocodile run by. Mallow asks why he didn't stop it, and Toad says, because I left my bazooka at home. Yeah, he's got an attitude. He chased after him through the woods outside the kingdom and eventually catch him. Mallow is a magic user because he's an original character of this game and is therefore allowed to use magic. Hell yeah. And his attacks are weather based, lightning attacks and stuff like that. That's sick. You get the coin back and the crocodile thief named Croco takes off running. Mallow asks if you'd be so kind as to escort him back to the Mushroom Kingdom. Once you arrive in the Mushroom Kingdom, it's dark and there's an invasion of shy guys who are hopping around on swords like a pogo stick terrorizing the citizens.

25:09 Son of a bitch. You run around feeding shy guys, making your way back to the castle. It's a good thing Mallow asked for a fucking escort back home. Yeah, right? He's kind of a useless frog, except for the fact that he's magical, which like you'd think there'd be something he could do about the jumping, but whatever. You get back to the throne room and the Chancellor is cowering in a corner as a large red man on a big bouncing sword named Clay Morton has taken over the castle. Behind the throne, you can see a small floating star. Clay Morton says, you were a fool for coming back here, and he attacks. He's like, we all keep telling you to go get Peach. And the first thing you do is a fetch quest for a baby frog.

25:54 And honestly, this is how most of the boss battles in this game go. You'll meet them for a grand total of 10 seconds and then battle and defeat them. And they'll immediately be like, let's fight to the death, and then you kill them. Without saying a word, which makes it even more like fucking, oh, what's that bad movie that you don't like? Drive. Oh, yeah. Silent ass kicker. The star behind the throne becomes yours, and it flies into the sky and takes its place in the night sky. The Chancellor is free once more, and the last of the Shy Guys runs off, saying they will have to warn the boss that Mario is coming. Chancellor asks you to please save the Princess, as these Smithy Gang members are serious business. Malo says that you should go visit his grandfather to see if he knows anything about the Smithy Gang that could help you defeat them.

26:39 Grandfather knows everything. So the two of you head off to Tadpole Pond. You have to travel through a sewer system that's more like going through Splash Mountain than sewage. Oh, fun. All colorful with little scenes playing out all throughout the whole ride. And that's a dated reference now. Yeah, right. That doesn't even exist anymore. Okay, grandpa. You even have to do a barrel race section down a river of shit water. Ew, what? No. You finally make it to Tadpole Pond, where you're greeted by Malo's cousins. Actual tadpoles, but like gigantic ones. Oh, so they got the frog genes. Yeah. Has Malo done a DNA test? Grandfather says from off screen that he knew you were on the way.

27:22 The storm from earlier gave it away. Grandfather's name is the Frog Sage. And he comes flying in, dangling by a rope, being carried by a flying Lakitu on a cloud. What is a Lakitu? I told you, you're gonna have to just know Mario characters. I clearly don't. It's the one that flies around on the cloud and throws the spike creatures at you. Oh, I never knew their name. I always called them bastard. Yeah, in Mario Kart, they're holding the camera or they're holding you like when you fall off the cliff or whatever. Yeah, okay. I know exactly what you're talking about. Thank you. No problem. He's what you expect to see when you think of a frog. Green, long back legs, big mouth, long white beard.

28:04 Oh, yes. Santa frog. Nothing like Mallow. That's because Mallow is clearly not a lineage frog. Mallow's got some daddy crosshairs he's got to figure out. He says that he knows you have come to seek his advice, but this rope is really uncomfortable, so come follow me. Extravagant, yes. Comfortable, no. Then he turns to Lakitu and goes, Clear, full reverse. As he flies off, he tells the tadpoles in the water to form a bridge so you can follow. That's cool. You hop on their backs to an island where the frog sage is waiting for you. He says that he knows you're looking for Princess Peach, but there's something you don't know about her. She's no longer in Bowser's castle.

28:45 After the smithy gang took over and the sword fell from the sky, it not only sent you flying, but Bowser and Peach as well. So Peach is out in the world somewhere. Not really sure where, though. Malo then shows his grandfather the piece of star you found. The frog sage says that he believes shooting stars actually do have the power to grant wishes. Oh. So he suggests you find the other pieces of the star so you can use a wish to help defeat the Smithy Gang. You know, like Wonder Woman 1984. Oh my god. Clay Morton was also just one of the Smithy Gang's minions taking over areas of the world. There's a few others, so you should probably go stop them before taking on the castle.

29:29 Yeah, we're still in the first act, Grandpa. Plus, they probably know where the other star pieces can be found. But be careful out there. Some of these guys will make Bowser seem nice. He tells Mallow that he must accompany you on your adventure. Mallow says he can't do that. He's just a little tadpole. Frog Sage lets out a sigh and says, Mallow, I have something I need to tell you. Oh, wait, I was totally joking about the Mori Povich of it all. Hell yeah. This may come as a shock, but you're not a tadpole. A record skips, and all the tadpoles and Lakitu appear and go, Say what?

30:10 I love that the whole family is in on this. They're like, clearly, he doesn't look like any of us. But then when the reveal happens, they have to kind of charade together to be like, Oh, man. Like when one of your friends comes out and you're like, We knew. But you have to be supportive and be like, Yeah, I still love you. Oh, you hit it so well. Damn, it's not like the closet door was wide fucking open. But I love you still. Mario is the only one not surprised that this cream puff isn't a tadpole. The Frog Sage says that he was having some tea on a rainy day when he saw a basket floating in the water. When he approached it, he found a baby with the name Mallow on his belt.

30:50 So he adopted the little puff ball and called him his grandson. Oh, that's sweet. Mallow was about to cry and the Frog Sage stops him, saying that his real parents must be out there somewhere. It's time to go with Mario. Maybe the two of you can figure out Mallow's origin story on your adventure. Now it's time for the two of you to go. Rosedown is up ahead and they're going to need your help. Go there to continue your quest. On your way to Rosedown, you run into a group that makes you duck and hide. It's Bowser, and he has a small army of Whiz Koopas like Kamek, Koopa Troopers, and a contingent of Goombas led by the great Goom Hilda. Goom Hilda?

31:31 He is telling them that even though the bridge is out, he's confident that this group of 16 soldiers should be able to take back the castle. He's Bowser, after all, and that's his turf. Absolutely. They all march off toward the castle, and you head to Rosedown. When you get there, it's dark, and arrows are falling from the sky. Oh shit, we're in Lord of the Rings now? There are some toads outside, and when one of the arrows hits one of the toads, they become frozen and can't move. Oh shit. You head inside one of the houses to take cover, and inside is a young child playing with his action figures. He has one each of Mario, Peach, and Bowser.

32:12 He's playing out a scene of Bowser kidnapping Peach, and Mario coming in to stop him. But he makes Bowser bitch slap his Mario doll across the house. Oh shit. And you just look down embarrassed. Well, yeah, that's a horrific thing to see. You're like, okay, so I'm not walking into a situation that will support me. The kid sees you and flips out, but being a kid, he needs you to prove you're Mario, so you jump. The kid's like, no way. It's also kind of a slap in the face to Mario who thought their entire life that they were a frog and was let down by their inability to jump, and Mario's like, bitch, hop hop. That's like my specialty.

32:53 That's like my whole deal. The kid says, I'm playing Save the World. Want to play with me? It's not a game. It's reality. The kid's mom is around the corner, and she comes and asks if you would please play with her son. With the raining arrows outside, he's just been cooped up and has a lot of pent up energy. So you sit to play with him, and he says, Well, Mario just died, so you can be Bowser. Oh my god. He goes over to the dinner table and says, I'll be Gino. He lifts up a small wooden doll. It's like a Pinocchio if he was just wearing a blue cloak with a pointy blue hat. He says, take that! And he bashes Gino into Bowser, physically knocking you back.

33:35 Oh, how strong is this fucking kid? Well, you make Bowser strike back, knocking Gino and the kid backwards. Hell yeah, beat this child up. The kid says, here comes Gino's special move, shooting star. From Gino comes a bunch of little bullets and they hit you right in the face. Wow. Knocking you the fuck out. Holy shit. That night, while you recover from your concussion, the playroom is all put away while everyone sleeps. Through the window, a small glowing light like Tinkerbell comes flying into the house. It floats around and then lands on the Gino doll.

34:15 The doll glows and enlarges. Suddenly, Gino's eyes open, and the Pinocchio comparison becomes stronger because now he's a real boy. Oh no. He fumbles around as he gains his balance and heads out the front door. He has shit to do. He has errands to run now that he's a real boy. He's got an agenda. Oh no. The next morning, you wake up from your brain damage and head downstairs. You shouldn't have slept a concussion off. I know, right? Just to like take a beat. That's like the one thing they tell you not to do. Don't go to sleep. The little kid is telling his mom that he just watched Gino walk into the forest. She's like, that's nice, dear. You decide to check it out because the doll is missing, which is weird.

34:59 You go back outside and head to the forest, which is also covered in darkness and has falling arrows. You wind your way through the forest chasing after Gino, who constantly remains just out of reach. He has shit to do. He cannot be bothered by a man. He eventually leads you to an area where you hear someone saying 998 arrows, 999 arrows, 1000 arrows I have fired on those toes, and I'll fire another 1000. Oh my god, this kid's such a creep. Mallow wisely says, I think we found who's firing the arrows. Helpful. Thanks, buddy. We see the person saying this, and it's a living bow named the Bowyer with an army of about a dozen living arrows.

35:43 One of the arrows says they found a piece of star, and the Bowyer wants to use it as target practice. What? Suddenly, Gino falls in from above and says, Hold it right there. Gino says that they serve a higher authority, and that star belongs to everyone. Gino is a sleeper agent. He's here to liberate it. Hell yeah. Mallow and you watch this all go down, and Mallow says that he's totally down to help. From back here. Honestly, it feels like Gino has this. Gino had a mission? Gino became sentient for this specific mission. I kind of want to see what Gino's fucking with. Well, you run in and save Gino from a killing blow, actually. Oh, god damn it, Gino.

36:24 Gino says that his people know about Mario, and asks for your help beating the Bowyer. It's a pretty cool fight with the Bowyer able to lock out one of your moves entirely on a rotating basis. Oh, wow. After you defeat it, Gino thanks you and asks if you've realized yet that he's more than just a doll. Yeah, dude, you're sentient. What the fuck? Tinkerbell blessed you into existence. He's actually a visitor from above, and he's borrowing the doll's body for the time being. Oh, that's extra creepy, actually. I was kind of hoping it was the doll. Out of all the dolls he had in the room, Gino looked the strongest. Malo's like, you're from the sky?

37:05 That's crazy. It is. Gino says they actually come from even higher than the sky, from the Star Road, not to be confused with the Rainbow Road. Okay, I did have that in my head of like, oh, there's a whole astrological fucking world of the roads up there. The Star Road is the intersection where shooting stars become wishes. But a sword crashed through it, and he's here to set things right and to teach that sword a lesson. I love that. That's clearly the final fantasy of it all, is like there's a big ass sword. Yeah. If you see a sword, it's gonna fuck some shit up. There's seven pieces to the road, and you've already found two, so just five more to go. Yeah, that's it.

37:47 Then you have to defeat Smithy and his gang so you can repair the Star Road back to its former glory. Until then, stars won't be born, and wishes won't come true. Oh no, wishes. Gino joins her party, and the three of you set out to restore balance to the world and beyond. One of the living arrows overhears the entire story and runs off to tell Smithy your plan. When they run off, do they kind of do a little hop on the feather part? Hopping, yeah. That sounds very charming. While the three of you head back to Rosetown, as your defeat of the Boyer should have freed them from the raining arrows and darkness. It did, so you go back to the kids' house. He says, See, Mom, I told you Gino was alive.

38:27 The mom looks at Gino and goes, I can appreciate the commitment, but isn't it hot in that costume? She's like, no, no, I've seen this episode of South Park. This is awesome. Oh, and that kid's going to bully you. The kids all parents just don't understand. No, no, they don't understand. The kid wants to play, but Gino tells him the story of the star road. The kid says he has no idea what he just said. But if you're looking for star pieces, he saw something sparkly land near a town called Moleville. Maybe you can look there. What the fuck was this kid doing on the edge of Moleville? I think the mom needs to be more involved with her son's life. You know, it doesn't seem like there's other kids. It doesn't sound like there might be a dad in the picture, but you know, she seems pretty disconnected from one reality and to her child.

39:12 You get to Moleville, and it's exactly what you'd expect from a place called Moleville. It's a village inhabited by giant anthropomorphic moles. While going through the town, you find out that most everyone has gone off to investigate the star that landed nearby. I mean, wouldn't you? Yeah, absolutely. There was a storm of shooting stars when we lived in LA once, where we drove up to that fucking crazy ass hill in the valley. And there were 45 cars there. Entirely. The one street we thought we could really get away with, and we were up in the hills, we went up to where there's new constructions, we're like, no one's going to live here. We'll go to the end of this block where they're making shit. Not everyone fucking had the same idea.

39:54 We know from experience, when people see stars falling out of the sky, they're like, fuck yeah, let's get the selfies. Let's go check that shit out. Absolutely. You head towards it yourself when you hear a mighty growl. You find Bowser again, with just the Goombas and the Magikoopas left. They say that the rest of their allies have abandoned them. They only have experience fighting Mario, and he always wins. So like, they're not equipped to take back the castle at all. They have a terrible track record. Bowser tells them to shut it. He's the biggest bad there ever was. But if Mario finds out he got kicked out of his own castle, his reputation will never recover. That's so embarrassing for you.

40:34 They march off, and you head towards a nearby molehill to find the star. When you get to the molehill, you find out that the star crashed through it, and in doing so, trapped a couple kids inside. Oh, shit. Then their dad went inside, and it collapsed some more, trapping him as well. You dungeon crawl your way through some mines that are dug inside this molehill, through the mines for the miners, and eventually get robbed by that thieving bastard Crocco and his band of misfits. Motherfucker! They steal all your shit, and you chase them through the mines, picking them off one by one as you get all your stuff back. Crocco also has a babam on him that you take as well, in case you need to blow up on a wall to get the kids out.

41:17 Just in case. Yeah, which is exactly what you need to do. You find their dad that was also trapped inside here, and he shows you where to place the babam. You head in and come upon one of Smithy's henchmen, named Punchinello. Punchinello is a cool fucking name. He came here to fetch that star before you could. He uses bombs to attack you, and when you were about to defeat him, he calls in his ace up his sleeve. A humongous babam that lands on top of him, squishing him. Malo says if that thing goes off, the whole mountain will explode. Oh, because the molehill turned into a mountain? Yeah. I like that. Then a rock lands on the wick of the babam, and it lights.

42:01 Malo says to run, but it's too late. The babam explodes in a mushroom cloud, turning the screen white. The dust settles, and the three of you are perfectly fine. The mountain is still intact. The worst of it is that you're all covered in soot. Oh, it was a smoke bomb. Yeah, that's it. That's great. The star is now yours, and you have three of the seven you need. You find the two kids trapped in the mines, a girl named Dinah, and her baby brother, Mite. Don't you love a themed name? Yeah. So I'm from Northern California. My parents were going to name me Petaluma. Oh, really?

42:42 Which is a city in Northern California. Oh. And if I was a boy, I would have been named Sebastopol. What the hell? It's another city in Northern California. But thankfully, the San Andreas earthquake happened one pregnancy length before I was born. So unfortunately, I relate to the localized naming conventions in a pretty horrific way. People died. Yeah. But you were born. I was born. All of you hop in a minecart and tear ass out of there in a very difficult minigame. That's basically until dawn, right? Just running through the mines and shit. Yeah, right. Or I guess it's more like a tropical freeze. I was going to say, this game was inspired by Donkey Kong Country, and anyone who has played those games remembers the minecarts are the most difficult section of any Donkey Kong Country game.

43:30 I fuck up the jumps real easy. No, this is very easy to fuck up, too. I'm very excited for the Donkey Kong minecart ride though. I cannot wait for that. That's going to be so fun. It's going to be sick. The scene cuts to the children's parents, pacing back and forth in their home. The mom says she's worried, but has a feeling they'll be dropping in any moment now. She's like, why did I name my kids Dynamite? The dad says she needs to calm down. They still have to use the front door just like everyone else. That's not soothing. What the fuck? At that, your minecart crashes through the roof of their home. Oh. Fuck you, dad. You can't tell me what to do. Everyone's fine and the parents are grateful to you for finding their kids and bringing them home safe.

44:11 Don't worry about the hole in the roof. Dad's a handyman and can have it fixed up in no time. Oh, sweet. That's convenient. You leave the house and a beetle lands on your hat. Which one, Ringo? It's definitely Paul. A bunch of shy guys are chasing it, and they surround you, demanding you hand over the beetle. Their boss, Booster, loves beetles. That's so whimsical and weird. Right? Well, ever since that princess who fell from the sky showed up, Booster has been too busy trying to woo her to catch any of his own beetles. I thought you were going to say that he's trying to collect a bunch of beetles to present to her, to win her over.

44:52 Bitches love bugs, right? Honestly, knowing Booster, that wouldn't surprise me either. Fucking Booster. The beetle flies off, and the shy guys leave you alone as they chase after it. Imagine all the beetles. Hearing about the princess, you decide to go pay this Booster fellow a visit. You make it to his tower, because he has a tower apparently. Of course, that's where he keeps all the beetles. Out front, you find Bowser, all alone. And he's crying. With no hegoombas and no koopas? Nobody but him. Oh, he's never alone. He's, you know, this is what happens when extroverts have to face the reality. That they must be alone with their thoughts at some point.

45:32 Oh, poor guy. He says that Booster has such a nice tower and how much he misses the old days. Peach, screaming for her life. Mario, coming to save her. Things were so much simpler back then. He's really like, I miss my real estate. This sucks. Bowser turns around and sees you. He freaks out and quickly wipes the tears from his eyes, acting all macho and goes, Okay, Bowser, be normal. Hi, how have you been? Then he turns around all stupid, stupid, stupid. Be more aggressive. This is not a conversation he's ever had with Mario. He's never had a cordial interaction. And the second he's a little vulnerable, he fucks it all up. Once again, Bowser turns to you and says, What are you doing here?

46:16 Better. From high above on top of the tower, Peach is standing on a balcony crying. Oh, honey. She stops crying and asks herself if she heard voices. She peers over the balcony and sees you down below. She cries out, Mario, I'm up here. Bowser turns to you and says, Yep, that's your queue. I'm going back to my castle. What castle, bitch? And he stomps off. Where he's go- He has nowhere to go! You go to the door of the tower and knock. The sign out front does say welcome after all. Oh, okay. There's someone clearly standing at the door, as you can see their face through the window in the door. But they refuse to acknowledge you or open it.

46:57 You stand back to regroup when the ground begins to shake. Oh, no. You look behind to see Bowser charging at the door full speed. Hell yeah! He turns at the last second and uses his spiked shell to crash through the doorway, laughing as he does. He's the green shell? Yeah. The door is demolished and Bowser turns to you and says, I know, I know, you just saw me destroy that door and thought, oh, that Bowser, he's so big and strong. I wish he was on my team. I kind of thought that. He says he's probably going to regret this, but he offers to let you join his army of minions. You can start up as a goomba and work your way up, but if you are able to recruit, we can get more goombas.

47:42 And then it turns into a pyramid scheme. Or a Patreon. What? No. So you pretend to go along with it, realizing that yeah, you could use someone with Bowser's strength on your side. And for the first time in their shared history, Bowser and Mario team up. Aww, friendship. From here out, you can only have three people in your party at a time, but you can sub out the fourth whenever you want, even with a party member who has zero health during battle. You head inside the tower, and there's some shy guys bustling around working. There's also a wonderful Easter egg to Final Fantasy VI in here with a model toy of a mech suit from that game. That's cute. Booster has instructed the shy guys to attack you, and you have to battle your way up this tower in order to get to him.

48:26 Booster is basically a Wario knockoff. I love Wario. Unreasonably so. I didn't play a lot of these games growing up. The first console I had was the PlayStation 1. I had a Game Boy Color. I had like three games on it. You know, I just really missed the boat. So coming in as an adult, I'm like, that one's fucking weird. I like that little squat one that yells a lot. Well, this guy, he's got scraggly facial hair and a big mouth. Just instead of all yellow, he wears all red with a Viking helmet. Oh, like Flava Flav. Yeah, a lot like Flava Flav. I understand now.

49:07 You chase and chase, and there's another great Easter egg in this tower where you go behind a pillar, and when you come out the other side, you're 2D Mario from the very first Super Mario game. Oh, that's cute! Yeah, but it's short lived, and you have to revert back to this game's version before continuing. You find Booster in a room, and he says that the princess he found keeps yelling the same thing over and over again. Mario, help me. Mario, help me. Do you know if this is a sign of happiness where she comes from? I like him a lot. He's weird. Then he realizes what she's actually saying, and that you are Mario. So he sends some more minions after you and fucks off.

49:47 You find the balcony where Peach is being held, and the door is locked. She says that Booster has put a spell on the door, and only he can open it. Booster comes into the room you're in with some shy guys, and you duck behind a curtain to hide. They're practicing for a wedding between Booster and Peach. Everyone's jumping to marry Peach. Is her pussy magic? It must be. Do her tits exude beer? She's cute, but she's kind of mid. I think Daisy's cuter, to be real. Totally. They eventually find you hiding, but for whatever reason, don't realize it's you. Then Booster invites you to the wedding, and he heads out to the balcony to get Peach. Once outside, Booster and Peach are nowhere to be seen, and a couple mini bosses drop in to fuck your day up.

50:34 There it is. You fuck theirs up instead, and then jump off the balcony to chase after Booster. He has Peach strapped to his back and doesn't seem to realize it because he says he can hear her but not see her. I like to think that Bowser is taking notes. He's like, that's actually fucking genius. I've never gotten this close to actually marrying her. Yeah, right? Then he hears Peach cry out for you, so he turns around, and now he recognizes you. He says, you're not invited to the wedding anymore. You can still register and check our gifts and stuff, but you do not have a seat at the table. You're actually welcome to race him up the hill to the venue if you want, but you won't be allowed any cake.

51:14 No cake for you. No. That's so funny. A minigame later, and you're at the top of the hill. At the top is a small town called Merrymore. It's a wedding destination with a romantic hotel and a cute little chapel where people love to get married. Oh, I mean, we live in Vegas, so I get it. Yeah, for many toads, this is the place they dream of getting married someday. Aww. At the chapel, you find a bunch of toads outside and they're upset. They were in the middle of a wedding when some asshole barged in and kicked everyone out. Can you imagine? And the woman he had with him did not seem to be consenting. So no one's happy about this. No.

51:55 You sneak into the chapel through the basement and the door to the altar is locked. You and Bowser team up to break down the door, crashing the wedding. You know, Bowser is mortified and excited to see this because he's like, I at least get to see someone marry my girl. I'm very upset it's not me though, but man, she looks good in that dress, you know? You smash into a group of shy guys who crash into Peach and Booster. Peach's accessories go flying everywhere, but she's finally not being held by Booster. She's distraught because her stuff is all over the place now. She can't handle it and begins to cry. It's been an overwhelming time for her, I get it. It's a big day.

52:35 Booster grabs her and tells her that the show must go on. He sees Peach crying and asks, What's going on? Why is water coming from her eyes? How dare you emote? He opens his mouth and catches Peach's tears, saying, Mmm, salty. They just met and he's licking her tears. This is salt burn. I don't like it. A shy guy says that she appears to be crying, sir. Booster's all, that's ridiculous. That's something people do when they're sad. Why would she be sad on her wedding day? That's disgusting, really. The shy guys say they collect her belongings so she stops crying while Booster and she begin the ceremony. There's no officiant, but let's just ignore that part.

53:18 You steal back Peach's belongings from the shy guys and approach Booster from behind. He freaks out and Peach yells out, Finally! You grab Peach and throw her high in the air, then hold out your arms to catch her. She comes floating back down with all her jewelry firmly back in place. Atta girl. Landing on top of you as you fall to the ground. Peach sees Bowser and cries, Eek! It's Bowser! But if you're here too, then she knows she'll be safe. She's like, I am surrounded by men who have kidnapped me. Yeah. And my boyfriend who refuses to give me a single word of affirmation. Baby girl is stressed.

53:59 Well, then she offers you a kiss. She leans in and Bowser goes, Sure, kiss him when I'm the one who busted down the door. Oh my god, you are not entitled to affection because you've done something nice. Nice coins do not exchange for sex. Then Booster says, If we're giving out kisses, I'll take one too. Oh my god, I hate everyone in this. Peaches goes, I'm confused. You're not confused, you're angry. This is the feeling of angry. That's why she's confused. She lives in a magic world where she doesn't get those feelings. Oh. Then she leans in and finally gives you a kiss on your cheek. Oh, it's a cheek kiss? Your face turns red and you hear Bowser say, It feels like sandpaper.

54:44 Oh, no. You look over and realize Booster and Bowser kissed each other, each thinking they were kissing Peach. I like that. Peach is like, damn, I wish I had a camera for that one. And Bowser and Booster both get upset. Peach says she needs to get back to the Mushroom Kingdom ASAP, and your party turns to leaf. Just then, the chefs who made the wedding cake come in, excited to present their masterpiece. They realize you're taking the princess and won't stand for it. They didn't work this hard for nothing, and they attack you. This is why we did cupcakes at our wedding. Yeah. We did platters, so there was like a dozen different flavors of all kinds of cupcakes. I'm not going to eat your fucking lemon verbena raspberry fucking ganache ass cake that is weirdly dry and wet at the same time.

55:32 Why is your cake so wet, Lord? Lord, why are her pies so wet? That's my biggest takeaway is that boring weddings suck. Well, the cake comes alive. Oh, ours didn't do that, but okay. And it attacks because of course it does. You fight the cake, beating it down layer by layer. Nailed it. Instead of killing the cake, the fight gets interrupted by Booster. He sees the cake and says that was the only part of the wedding he'd been looking forward to anyway. And it was the only part Mario was excluded from, and he immediately got involved in the cake. So he's been violated on a couple fronts from his eyes. Well, he gets his minions to throw the last bit in the air, and he opens his gigantic mouth and swallows the sentient cake alive and whole.

56:18 Oh my God. He says it's so good, it makes him burst into tears. Oh, I get it. I've had really good cake before. Then he says, all right, wedding complete. Let's go, boys. What did he think a wedding was? Really quick. Well, he leads his shy guys out of the church. Peach is like, that was crazy. I almost got married today. Hopefully someone someday will marry me, but not today. That's right. Mario's never put a ring on it, huh? It's been a couple decades, my guy. Shitter get off the pot. Outside, the Toads ask you if they can finish having their wedding now and they head back inside.

56:59 Are you guys done ruining our special day? And like, if this is a destination venue, they've clearly saved up for years to afford this. Family came in from out of town. And these knuckleheads had a food fight. Ugh, I hate it. Well, back in the Mushroom Kingdom, you head straight to the Chancellor. He's overjoyed at Peach's return, and she reclaims her throne. Then she turns to you and says, I'm grateful you saved me once again, but how the hell can you trust Bowser? The Chancellor goes, I'm sorry, what did you just say? Then Bowser reveals himself as having been there the whole time.

57:40 The Chancellor is shook, and everyone in the room freaks out that Bowser is here. Peach tells them all to calm down. Mario has him under control. Your group goes on to recap the game so far for the Chancellor. Partially through you miming some of it filled in by Malo and Gino. The idea of Mario just constantly flapping. Yeah. And them going, oh yes, and then you follow the star. Yep, they understand perfectly. Of course. Peach decides to join the party officially so she can help restore balance to the world and eradicate the Smithy Gang. But the Chancellor says not a chance in hell. She's the princess, and if anything worse happens to her, the kingdom will be in ruins. Peach will not be going with you on this journey.

58:23 At that, Peach decides to turn in for the night. Being kidnapped is exhausting. Yeah, your wedding day is an exhausting day. You don't sleep better than after running around for 12 hours being beautiful and loved. You leave the castle and hear your name called out. You look around and see Peach, high up in the castle, waving from a window. She leaps out of the window and floats down with an umbrella like she's Mary Poppins. Oh, that's cool. She lands and says, Yeah, I'm going with you. Your group isn't sure where to look next, so Mallow suggests going back to his grandfather, the Frog Sage. Back at Tadpole Pond, the Frog Sage asks if you guys have tried Star Hill yet.

59:08 The aptly named Star Hill. Gino's like, Yeah, Star Hill. That's the most logical place. Let's go there. When you arrive at Star Hill, which is basically a part of the moon, but on Earth, Oh, cool. Gino says that this is where shooting stars land after they become wishes. But since wishes aren't coming true right now, they're just unfulfilled hopes and dreams. Oh, it's like a sad bar. Yeah, you can find these wishes while you explore, and they'll say really sad things like, I can't wait to start a family someday as the wishes that won't come true. Oh, my God. Jesus Christ. Yeah, no, this is just going to your hometown bar after you've been graduated for a couple of years, and you're just like, yeah, I could still be an athlete.

59:54 And you're like, no, you fucking can't. Not at all. I'm gonna move out of my parents. No, the fuck you won't. Well, after some puzzle solving, you find a star piece. You're fourth. Three to go. Peach says, you guys haven't tried Seaside Town yet. It's a busy seaport. If there's not one there, then maybe people have heard stories of where another may be located. You get to Seaside Town, and it's not as busy as Peach had said. The toads here are weird. They have grayish blue faces and they stand on the furniture. But otherwise, they speak to you pretty normally. It gets suggested you check with the town elder. He tells you that he did see a star crash into the sea not far off the shore.

1:00:37 You check it out and find a cave that you enter, allowing you to go into the sea without having to get wet. Until you get to a part of the cave that holds a sunken ship. You have to swim down to it and then enter it. Fortunately, it's dry inside, and you find a note from the captain saying the ship was attacked by a giant squid, and the squid took the ship down. Oh hell yeah, Kraken! You dungeon crawl and puzzle solve your way through the boat, fighting undead enemies as you do. I love this. This is fucking sick. You even have to fight the giant squid that took the ship down. Of course you do! That's so cool! Eventually, you make your way toward the captain's quarters. You find some land sharks dressed as pirates, talking about their leader Johnny.

1:01:21 They love Johnny, clearly. Johnny Topside. I knew you were going to do that. I'm going to take a shot real quick. They see you, and they defend their territory. Once you defeat them, they run to get reinforcements. Reinforcements arrive and try throwing a barrel at you down some stairs. You duck, and it takes out their crewmates further down the stairs. They're impressed and say that you can see Johnny now, and they allow you into the captain's quarters. Johnny is a slightly larger shark than the others, with a hook for a hand and a gold chain around his neck. This is how I see myself when I think about what I want to be when I grow up.

1:02:03 He's got a fucking chain and a hook, and he's a shark? This is so fucking cool. He's sitting in an opulent chair holding a glass of wine with a star piece hanging on the wall over his head. Yeah, this is entirely what I want to be when I grow up. He looks at you and says, Ah, so you're the Mario. Not much to look at. Heard you're collecting stars. Well, if you want this one, you're going to have to fight for it. He pulls out a trident, and you battle Johnny and his pirates. Oh, I love a trident. I love pirates. I love nautical shit. Fuck yeah. During the fight, if you pay attention, you'll notice that Johnny may or may not be a person in a shark costume.

1:02:45 He's left shark. It doesn't get addressed, but his eyes look fake. All the other sharks have glowing yellow eyes, but Johnny has opaque button-like eyes? Oh no. He's like Coraline's evil family when they go to the upside-down world or whatever. Yeah, but inside Johnny's mouth is a separate set of blinking, glowing yellow eyes. It's literally me. In fact, many, but not all enemies throughout the game have the same design. Oh. But it never gets brought up in any instance. Very strange. I want the conspiracy theories on that. I might go ham in the Discord on this one.

1:03:26 Well, after you wear him down a bit, he asks Mario to go 1v1 with him just for the thrill of it all. Once you beat him, he hands over the fifth star. You head back to Seaside Town, and everyone you had met before, including the town elder, is right by the welcome sign waiting for you. He laughs at you and says, You are so gullible. He's obviously Speardovich of the Smithy Gang, and he just tricked you into bringing him that star. He takes it from you and runs off. Son of a bitch! You catch up to him and his friends, the other blue townsfolk, and they're on a seaside cliff saying that the blade is late to pick them up.

1:04:08 Johnny comes up out of the water with some of his pirates and tells Spiridovich that Mario won that star fair and square. Fuck yeah! The ocean does not fucking allow for cheaters. Straight up. Spiridovich says it's time to take off their disguises and the six toads merge together to form a gigantic knife creature. You just said the toads come together to make a knife creature. This is fucking ridiculous. I love it. Johnny doesn't join the fight, unfortunately, but you defeat Spiridovich anyway. You get your star back and head to Seaside Town, where you find the entire population locked in a storage room.

1:04:49 They're all normal looking toadies, and they're grateful for the rescue. Toadies! Peach is happy to have freed the townsfolk, and Bowser says it's really messed up those imposters not only kidnapped the whole town, but then locked them up. He would never do something like that. He's like, I'm an evil dictator, but I don't fuck around with that shit. Peach is like, bitch, please, you kidnapped me yesterday. I appreciate that Peach's humanitarian side is really at the forefront of this. That's one of those understated elements of her. Yes, she's cute, she's badass, she's cool, but she also very much cares for others, and she wants her communities and her surrounding communities to be healthy and taken care of, and she's not going to fucking back down when some spiky back motherfucker tries to pull some shit and pretend he's better than he is.

1:05:38 She's like, absolutely fucking not. I fucking love Peach. Well, Bowser responds, and he says, In all those times, I never once locked you up, and you never got hurt. It's very, yeah, but did you die? This is your friend that's a terrible driver being like, We got there though. Yeah, he's still kidnapping her. The townsfolk point you in the direction of the local volcano, saying they saw a star crash up there. Of course it's in a volcano. Yeah, so you head to it. On your way, it's basically a giant dungeon, and halfway up, you find yourself in a tiny little cliffside village. It's called Monstro Town. It's the home of creatures from all over who just want to live a peaceful coexistence.

1:06:22 Problem is, the rest of their species are all aggressive, so nobody trusts them. This little town is their sanctuary. The local elder says that no stars crash nearby, which means the only place left to look is up higher. Higher than the volcano even, up in the clouds. He calls in some flying Para Koopa Troopers. He asks them to take you to Bean Valley, and they agree telling you to meet them outside. You can shop around here, as there are shops, and in one of them, you find a Goomba running the cash register. The Goomba jumps at the sight of Bowser. It's Goom Hilda, the former leader of his Goomba troops.

1:07:03 She dropped out of the army, and now she just has a fucking retail job. Yeah, she went AWOL and has been running this shop ever since. She left because, well, she was going to be a mama. She's pregnant? She says, come out and meet Uncle Bowser, kids. Oh, thank God she didn't say dad. Three little Goombas come hopping up from behind the counter to meet their Uncle Bowser. Oh. Bowser says it's okay that Goom Hilda left. He understands. Plus, he found new minions to replace her, Mario and his friends. See, Mario should be able to talk. To set this shit straight. Another one of his former soldiers can be found in a dojo here in the side of the volcano, which, you know, perfect place for a dojo, really.

1:07:50 Obviously. The soldier feels bad about Bowser losing his castle and came here to train so he can come back and help Bowser get his groove back someday. You can battle him in a sparring match, and eventually you can challenge the dojo's sensei, a little flea-like character named Jinx. He's a bit of a mini-boss as he gets harder and harder to beat the more you fight him. He's a real bitch by the end, honestly. When you beat him, he's like, you are the sensei now. Oh, okay. And he begins to teach the Mario jump technique. You also get some good armor out of it. Hell yeah. After all that, you depart for the cliffside where the paratroopers are waiting. You platform hop on their backs up the side of this cliff.

1:08:31 At the top, you head down a path that takes you to a question block. You bonk it, and a classic Mario vine climbs up and out of it. You climb, and it takes you to a cloud world. You can walk on the clouds here and climb more vines going higher and higher as you do. Columbia. You finally make it to the top of the vines where you take a bio shot. Thank you. Because you find yourself in a city in the sky. The people here look familiar. They look like adult versions of your little friend, Mallow. This is Nimbus Land, the home of the cloud people. You see a palace and head towards it, as most of the town is hanging out in front of the gates.

1:09:16 A woman comes out of the palace, and she's not a cloud person. She's a bit more human, but has a really wide head like Hey Arnold. Oh, cool. And she deadass is wearing a bird for a wig. Oh no, she's definitely a widow. That is some East Coast old money. My husband died under mysterious circumstances. I don't know what her deal is. I fucking love her. Yeah, it's like a dead parrot with the wings draped over the sides like strands of hair. That's fucking crazy. She sounds amazing. She tells everyone to shut up. Just immediately. The king is sick and he's getting worse. So it's important everyone stops coming by asking to see him.

1:09:58 You have to give it the accent. Everybody shut up. And she's smoking a cigarette. And it's a Virginia Slim. It's those really long thin ones that old ladies smoke so they don't get the big wrinkles in their mouth. Or like Cruella de Vil. Yeah, my man's not feeling good. He's got a bummy tummy and you people aren't making it easier on him. Well, she's not the queen. No, but she is a queen. Well, also, after a long time and much searching, we finally found his missing child, Prince Mallow. She yells out, Prince, out here now. Mallow, get up here and meet your dad. Nobody comes and she says, excuse me, and runs inside.

1:10:41 Oh, where'd he go? Finally, a gigantic fat black bird comes hobbling out of the doorway. What in the Anastasia fuck? The woman whose name is Valentina points to the bird and says, presenting Prince Mallow. No, no, no, we're in Anastasia. That's definitely not the missing monarch. The townsfolk all welcome him back, saying things like, my, you've grown and I hardly recognize you. And you're a bird now. This prince turns his head and whispers something to Valentina.

1:11:22 She turns and says, really? I couldn't. Are you sure? She says the prince has just asked her to be his queen, and she is gracefully accepting. Oh, my God. She says, Queen Valentina. I like the sound of that. Okay, that's all, everyone. Back to your little lives. She really got this bird to be like, all right, bird, you're going to come in, you're going to ass stage these motherfuckers, and in return, give me a crown. We're going to scam these motherfuckers. We got this. Yeah, she and the prince just go back inside the castle. They have a wedding to plan. Malo turns to you and goes, that's crazy. There's a prince with the same name as me. Can you believe it? Yeah, buddy, definitely can.

1:12:04 You're like, dude, you're a cloud. You can't be this thick. You go around town meeting people, and you eventually meet the local statue maker. He's the person the royals use to make their official portrait statues. Malo sees one in the corner and says, that's weird. You have one of me. The sculptor says, oh, that's the king from when he was a child. Then he gets a good look at Malo, who introduces himself. The sculptor says, wow, it's really you, Prince Malo. Malo says, what, what, what? Me? Mario gives Malo's life story through mime, turning into both Malo and the frog sage to do so.

1:12:50 The sculptor says, yeah, that all makes sense. You were raised by the frog sage. Sounds good. Yeah, that tracks. He says that he knew that Valentina was up to no good. The prince she's parading around looks nothing like the real Malo. If that's a lie, then maybe the king isn't really sick either, which means he's in trouble. Malo's like, we have to save my parents, Mario. Malo charges the front gates, but gets knocked back by the guards. He comes back crying, all out of ideas. The sculptor says he might have one, and to stand still. You do, and he spray paints you gold. Oh!

1:13:31 He says he was about to drop off a statue at the castle anyway. If you don't move, you can pass yourself off as one of two, and sneak in that way. The guards see the Mario statue and say they don't know who that is. The sculptor says, it's Ma-Ma-Mariota, Valentina's cousin. Now that she's going to be the queen, we want to make sure we're involving her family. Yeah, they're like, oh, yeah, right. Mariota, move along. They're like, yes, we accept this. The sculptor gets you inside, and Valentina is there waiting. She sees the you statue and says, you are magnificent.

1:14:14 A true work of art. She dismisses the sculptor and yells out, Dodo, get in here. The phony Prince Mallow comes hobbling out and approaches her. She tells him to set up the statue, and he agrees. He puts you on a plinth and leaves you on display. Just as you go to move, Valentina reminds Dodo to give the statues a good polish, and you have to pretend to be a statue a bit longer. After he's done, he finally leaves. You go through the castle and eventually find a door with a note on it. It says that the king is sick and to keep it down out here in the hall. You try to open the door, but it's locked. Bowser says to step aside.

1:14:54 He's got this one. Just as he goes to crash through the door, Mallow trips him and Bowser lands flat on his face. Mallow says that if his dad is actually sick, then barging in on him wouldn't be a good idea. He said, manners, Bowser. So we should go talk to Valentina and find out what's really going on around here. You find her, and she's yelling at Dodo again, saying the king's not going anywhere, even if this Mario character is really out there. Then Dodo points at you, and she's like, okay, I'm out of here. And she dips out a side door, followed closely by Dodo. You chase them down and catch up to Dodo first. You fight him and he flies off when you defeat him.

1:15:37 You continue pursuing Valentina through the castle and come to the last door. You step through and find yourself standing on nothing. Oh, no. Like a fucking Looney Tunes cartoon. The door leads to the outside, and you fall down to a cloud below. You have to re-enter the town, and when you do, Valentina is just getting back herself, and the townsfolk are surrounding her, asking about the king and the rest of the royal family. This drives her nuts, and she tells them all to leave her alone. She has better things to do than listen to the complaints of peasants. I am planning a wedding. Do you know how many pastas I have to try? Get out of my way.

1:16:17 My boss is sick. I'm busy. Then she sees you and starts calling for Dodo. Oh, no, Dodo, get over here. When Dodo doesn't come, you engage her in battle. All right, I'll take care of this myself. I fucking love her. Once in battle, Dodo does show up, and he takes one of your party members off to fight on his own, leaving two of you to fight Valentina. Oh, shit. Once that 1v1 is done, both Dodo and the party member rejoin the fight. At the end of the battle, Valentina says, that's all, folks, and Dodo picks her up, and they fly off once and for all. You weren't fucking around with that Looney Tunes shit.

1:16:58 Buddy, buddy, buddy, we're getting out of here, Dodo. As they take off, Valentina drops the key to the king's room. Malo grabs it and runs off, prompting you to pull out Peach's umbrella, as Malo cries tears of joy, causing a rainstorm. The rain clears, and Malo takes you to introduce you to his parents, King and Queen Nimbus. When they meet Peach, the king gets starstruck and asks for her autograph. He immediately skips over his missing son, and is like, oh my god, I'm so familiar with your work. Yeah, and the queen is like, control yourself, dear. He sees a young woman, and he's like, wow, and she has to be like, babe, calm down.

1:17:41 Well, then they meet you, and the king is all, oh, come on, I have to get Mario's autograph. Let me get a selfie. The queen again says, no. Then Bowser is introduced, and the king goes, oh, this is just too much, really. I can't get a single autograph. But the queen tells him to calm himself, and he says, fine. Then he meets Gino and goes, hi. Sorry about the Star Lane or whatever, that sucks. He's like, I don't know who the fuck you are. Gino's like, it's Star Road? And the king's all, same difference. Anyway, no star didn't crash into the side of the volcano. It landed in the volcano.

1:18:21 If you want it, you'll have to go down there and get it. But be careful, there's a fired dragon down there too. Of course there is. He's not going to like you going into his home. Malo tells his parents that he has a world to save, but he'll come back after this adventure is over. They're like, okay, cool. See you later, buddy. Good luck with that, kiddo. Before going to the volcano, you can visit the frog sage to let him know Malo found his family and that he's royalty and shit. He's like, that's awesome. Also, I heard Booster found himself another woman he's going to marry that also happened to fall from the sky. Oh, my God. If you go to Booster's tower, you'll find him on the balcony with Valentina. Of course. I knew it.

1:19:01 I love it. Look, I've just been through something. But I heard you throw a hell of a wedding. Well, he whispers something in her ear, and she says that it was the most beautiful thing anyone's ever said to her. Booster, I love you, baby. And then she takes his hand lovingly. Oh, they actually found really good partners. I know. That's some closure I didn't think we deserved. But I really appreciate it. That's really sweet. Now you can enter the volcano to go after the next star piece. Here you can find another nod to Donkey Kong Country, as one of the creatures you fight is just Donkey Kong in chains. Oh, shit. It's not the actual character. It's just the same character model.

1:19:42 There's also a toad in here that's unlike any other toad you've ever met. He's a much larger than usual toad, more beefy beef boy than fat. His mushroom cap hat doesn't have dots like everyone else. His has flames like a Harley Davidson. Is this Guy Fieri? It's Toad Fieri. Shut up. I love it. No, he's actually called Cinder Toad, but still. It's still like we're going to a mommy town or something. Yeah, it is Toad Fieri, goatee and all. I love that. He's just an item shop to stock up as this is a really long dungeon. But like, how cool is it that it's Toad Fieri for no fucking reason? Yeah, you have to mention him.

1:20:24 You eventually encounter and kill the fire dragon who is keeping the star piece in his treasure cave. You go into the cave, and just as you reach the star, it gets stolen right from your hands. A red robotic looking creature standing on two legs with a small cannon for a mouth named Axum Red says, We got the star. Then a green version named Axum Green appears and says, We're amazing. Axum Yellow materializes and says, We're unbeatable. Axum Pink shows up saying, We're gorgeous. Finally, Axum Black says, You'd better leave now, chumps. Did they form a mega Axum when they put all their powers combined?

1:21:06 Not yet. Oh shit, shut up, really? Fuck me, I was just making a Power Rangers joke. They run off with a star and you chase after them, climbing your way out of the volcano as you do. You catch up to them at the top of the volcano, where they are waiting for someone or something called The Blade to show up, just like those phony toads from before. They see you come out of the volcano and say, It's too late. The Blade is here. The Blade reveals itself, and it's a huge sentient airship, as the front of it is just basically a gigantic knife blade with eyes. That's so punk rock. The mighty morphin Axum Rangers jump on the Blade, and you follow behind.

1:21:47 Hell yeah. The ship becomes their Megazord, and you have to fight the Axum Rangers. Honestly, the absolute stranglehold the Power Rangers had on the world when this game came out. Oh my god, absolutely. Hardly anything has ever looked like it since maybe Fortnite or Minecraft, but like, only maybe. Pokemon? Eh, not even that. Honestly, the stranglehold Power Rangers had, it was like, it made it into a Mario game, if that's what you need to know about how big it was. Fair enough. Mario felt it needed the help of Power Rangers. There are six targets in this battle, with the five Rangers and the ship. It's one of those battles, though, where if you defeat the ship, it beats all of them instantly.

1:22:29 Oh, nice. The ship crashes and you jump off it back onto the volcano. The star returns to you, and now you just need the final one to restore the star road. You fought a dragon and the Power Rangers, it's ready to wrap this shit up. You go back to Nimbus Land to let Malo's parents know you got the star out of the volcano. They tell you that the only place the final star could possibly be is at Bowser's Castle. Malo explains that there's no way to get into Bowser's Castle, as the Smithy Gang has taken it over. The King goes, Well, why don't you just take the bus? Obviously! This is as confusing to you as it is to anyone else.

1:23:10 No, I love the bus. I get it. And he explains that they have a royal bus. It can take you wherever you need to go. As the Prince, Malo has access to the royal bus whenever he needs it. You go outside to catch the bus, and it pulls up looking like it's straight out of the Care Bears, honestly. I was thinking Totoro. Oh, no. That's even cuter. No, it's a cute little cloud car. Oh, I love that. You hop on, and it takes off towards Bowser's Keep. It drops you off right at the front door, and Bowser takes one step inside and is like, it's good to be home. He kicks his shoes off, he takes his pants off, and he's like, ah! Well, now it's time to teach that rat bastard Smithy a lesson for taking my castle from me.

1:23:52 Being Bowser's Castle, you have to go through a ton of rooms with lava pits and fireballs. You know, normal Bowser house shit. Yeah, completing a bunch of puzzles and challenges along the way. Is it helpful that Bowser's there, though? Nope, not at all. He doesn't fucking help? I mean, he's part of the gang, but no, he doesn't have any secrets. That's annoying. They're like, this is... you built the puzzle. You at least commissioned it. You should know the back end. He's like, nah, that's fucking workforce shit. I just wait for everyone else to undo the puzzles. Yeah, it's not like GLaDOS is gonna get electrocuted if she helps you. Yeah, he's just being a dick. Well, sometimes you'll run into Bowser's minions and they're attacking you as well. And you fight them with Bowser in your party, right?

1:24:33 Yeah, but after defeating one of them, they seem to come out of some kind of trance. Oh. They say they can't remember anything, and Bowser says, that's fine. Now that you have your head right, go round up any loyalists. We're taking back the castle today. But also to be clear, the time you were possessed will be taken out of your paycheck. You get to the throne room where you rescued Peach way back at the start of the game. Up on the chandelier, a samurai-looking motherfucker beckons you to come up and fight him. So you do, and you defeat him. He drops down, and the chandelier you're on starts rising. You and your friends dance and dance as the chandelier rises higher and higher, taking you to the roof, where the giant sentient sword is lodged into the castle.

1:25:19 You make it at the top, where you look up at the imposing sword, and finally, you're able to attack it. The sword's name is Exor, and he's a bitch of a fight. I bet. When you defeat him, he opens his mouth, which is the hilt of the sword body. In his mouth is a glowing purple portal, and it sucks your entire group into it. Oh, shit! Here, you enter the weapon world. Gino says that Exor must be the link between the Mushroom Kingdom world and whatever world the Smithy gang came from. Bowser's all, Well, I got my castle back, so best of luck to you guys. He said, I don't give a fuck. Mario, as a minion, it's your duty to help build the castle back to the way it was, so let's go.

1:26:02 Minion! Gino says that the portal is on the roof of his castle. If you don't defeat Smithy himself, then that portal will stay open, and Smithy's army will keep coming through your castle. I appreciate that they kept it 100, and they're like, but look, this is still in your best interest. Yeah, it's not safe until Smithy's defeated once and for all. Bowser says that would be an invasion of his privacy. Oh my god. He's in. It's classic RPG fare from here out, fighting the same bosses you already fought along the way once more. You also fight a boss you haven't encountered yet. He's the factory foreman and he's building more soldiers for Smithy's army.

1:26:43 Oh no. He's basically a walking Vegas Golden Knights logo. Oh! That's our pro hockey team. Our Stanley Cup winning hockey team. True. You defeat him and find a big button. Mallow figures it shuts off the factory and pushes it. It doesn't. It actually activates a claw that comes over and tries to grab Mallow. A claw! The claw. The claw. You stop it from happening and Mallow is relieved. You continue through the factory, tracing the origin of the army of minions that's being created. You find a tube that keeps spitting out bad guys, and Gino says that down that tube should be Smithy himself.

1:27:27 This is the point of no return. Are you ready for this? You see another big button and push it, letting the claw come grab you and it drops you into the tube. You land and find yourself standing in front of a very large robot man. It has a long white beard with white hair. It's wearing a crown on its head and a star on its chest. Santa? No, it's still not Santa. Fuck! None of these games have Santa. Yet. He's holding a large mallet, and when he strikes it against some liquid metal, the liquid turns into a soldier and marches off. He says, You are a group of fools. You just brought him the other six stars.

1:28:11 Okay, you know what? This motherfucker has a point. Now all he has to do is defeat you, and he'll have all seven. Then he can overrun the world with living weapons and rule over everything. Oh, no. You fight him, and it's an epic final battle. Hell, yeah. With Smithy using his hammer to change his form and attack pattern at random. Oh, cool. He finally beat him, and he explodes, leaving the final star piece behind. He merged the star with the others, and they reform the star road. Gino says, Well, everyone, thanks for the help. And then a bright light shines, and he turns back into a doll, very unceremoniously.

1:28:52 Oh, no. He's just like, My work here is done, and he fucks off out of the body of the doll. Yeah, the little glowing ball of light that took over Gino's body lifts up and away, as the rest of your party waves goodbye to him. That is so jarring. Outside Bowser's castle, you watch as the giant sword Exor evaporates and finally disappears, leaving Bowser's castle unoccupied. We next get a montage of all our friends we met along the way, celebrating the feat of the Smithy Gang. Malo returns home and takes his rightful place as Prince of Nimbus Land. Bowser and his remaining troops rebuild what's left of Bowser's castle.

1:29:35 Then we see a stage as Mario and Peach walk out and embrace each other in its center. They turn to the audience and pose for a picture, along with all the supporting cast of the game. With a wink, Mario says thank you. The credits roll, and Luigi leads a parade of characters across the screen. Even in the remake, they use the original game's credits sequence because two teams built this game in the end, the original and the remake. So they let the original credits roll, as those people deserve all the recognition in the world. But then the graphics switch to the remake's versions as the remake's credits scroll.

1:30:16 That's fucking cool. The parade ends, and our five adventurers sit together and watch fireworks over Princess Peach's castle. The end. That's beautiful. That was Super Mario RPG. I fully did not anticipate that to have such a cool story. Yeah, right? It's deep, it's engaging, it's got so much going on, so much humor. It's so charming. I really think that this should have been the basis for the Mario movie, to be real. This is fucking great. The way Detective Pikachu was a great movie. Yeah, you take enough of the base, but you update it, you make it palatable for a movie script versus a game script, which is longer, a little more tedious in parts, but yeah, this was fucking sick.

1:31:01 Yeah, I'm really glad you enjoyed that. Like I said, for many people, this is their favorite RPG ever made. And we have it on the Switch. I might throw this on. This could be a good airport game or something. It is, and I have to admit, there are parts of it that are a little repetitive. Just in the gameplay aspects? In the gameplay aspects, you know, it's made so anybody can play it. And so there are times where it just gets a little too easy. And you're just kind of burning through it. And yeah, but other than that, I really enjoyed this game. That's fucking great. I really hope they get a sequel, because like, that's really cool. It would be a really good complete story to have just that sequel come out, you know? I mean, it's this one guy's life mission. Right? He can't retire until the sequel comes out. And honestly, Mallow, this is the only game he's in.

1:31:42 Wow, because he was the original character that got brought in. And Gino was as well. Gino has made it as a skin in Smash Brothers. Oh, cute. Not as a character, but as a skin, I guess. I don't understand that. And that's a deep cut. It is. It's a very deep cut, but that's really about it. Goodness. I mean, Mallow's sweet and feels like you get this really fun full arc of this kid who doesn't know where he is. He goes through his Maury Povich era. He finds his family and he's like, BRB, I'm going to go save the world. And then he comes back to reclaim his throne. That's incredible. Yeah, right. It's Lord of the Rings. There's a dragon? Yeah. You have to get the treasure from the fucking dragon.

1:32:23 I get it. Totally. You know the words. I've seen these peripherally. Well, if you enjoyed that, please make sure you like and subscribe to us. It helps us show up in other people's feeds so we can all geek out together. And if you want to geek out with us, you can always pop over to the othercastlepodcast.com. That's the othercastlepodcast.com. We've got all the episodes listed there, and you can also access our Patreon, where we will have the history of Mario coming out today. Yes, you can do the history of Mario. I've got the history of Donkey Kong on there, history of Tetris. We got all sorts of great histories on there as well. The Tetris one was emotional. I know. It's one of my favorites. I was screaming at you. Like, why is this happening in my silly little, like, line game?

1:33:08 Well, anyways, we really want to shout out the Goomba gang that we have over on our Patreon. So we've got Berserk Panda, Andrew, That Chonky Boy, AJ Boy, Paul, Omar, Aaron, Cyrus, Unuseful, Molly, Krisha, Mollymauk, Jackie, Jacob, and Alan. Thank you for making this episode possible. We appreciate you. You're all stars to us, not broken ones, whole ass stars. And we appreciate you. Yes, we do. Thank you so much Goombas for listening. Come hang out with us on Discord, please. We have a great time over there. And this is Tom and Andrea reminding you. Keep your stars where you can see them, doll.

1:33:48 And don't skip the cutscenes.